Had Enough? - Final Part

X-MEN EVOLUTION FANFIC: Had Enough? –Final Part-

All characters and settings mentioned in this piece of writing belong to the studio/creators of X-men Evolution.

Please be sure to read the first sections of this by GoldFox20 [Links provided in Author's comment]


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A very silly mission, in a distant city that none of them wanted to go it. Just like most of the acolyte missions.
It had been several weeks since the terrible events that had taken place with Kurt, and whilst John, Piotr and Remy had all physically recovered, the mental injuries were still firmly in place. John would not even look at Remy, when he passed him in the corridors of the base, he would behave as though the Cajun was not there. If Remy should try and talk to him, he would pretend that he had not heard him… and the one time Remy had tried to corner him to talk things through, the pyromaniac had flown into a fearful rage and set fire to Remy's clothes. It had been a very near miss for the Cajun, who had escaped any serious burning, but it had confirmed to him that his friendship with John was well and truly maimed beyond repair.
Piotr had tried on many occasions to mend the situation, trying to tell John that Remy wasn't to blame, whilst trying to convince Remy not to give up. He had been unable to do much about either.

Some nights the Cajun had been desperately sad enough for Piotr to take pity on him, he would go to Remy and offer to be taken inside, knowing how much Remy enjoyed it, he hoped he could cheer Remy up. But often the Cajun said no… and when he did say yes, Piotr could tell that it was only serving to remind him of what he missed with John. After a while of trying his best, Piotr gave up on it as an idea, just because he wasn't doing a thing to help. He had tried everything he could think of doing, and eventually even he started to accept that this couldn't be fixed.

They still worked okay together as a team, mostly because they had to, but things were never the same.

At that very moment, they were busy searching an old junk shop for some artefact that Magneto insisted was of immense importance for something. As so often happened with things Magneto wanted, they couldn't actually find it… or any evidence that it even existed.
Remy had gone outside and down the street for a smoke and John was leaning on a wall on the other side of the street from the shop, waiting for Magneto to be done searching the shop. It was whilst he was waiting that he heard a funny noise coming from the alley beside the old shop. He tilted his head and wandered into the alley curiously, tracking the electronic beeping to a pile of trash.
He wrinkled his nose and kicked some of it aside, frowning as he found a long thin metal object with a digital timer on the front, which was beeping down the seconds as it counted down for something.
The pyromaniac's eyes widened as he realised what he had found… someone apparently knew the acolytes were there, and they wanted to get rid of them!
"There's a BOMB!" he shouted loudly, backing up the alleyway

Remy looked up as he heard the shout, and saw John standing staring at something. He knew John wouldn't shout something like that unless he knew it was real!
"Petit feu! GET AWAY FROM THERE!" he yelled, sprinting towards the transfixed mutant, somehow knowing he didn't have time, knowing the inevitable was going to happen. Well… he didn't have time to get them both away…
His eyes became steely as he ran faster, pushing his furthermost limit but still feeling like he was running in slow motion.

Barely in the nick of time, he reached John, and using the momentum from his run, grabbed him and hurled him as far as he could along the street, staring at the airborne form for a fraction of a second before the deafening blast went off beside him, he felt heat for a moment, then all went dark and silent.

John gave an involuntary yelp as he hit the stone pavement hard, the blast practically deafening him as he hit. He looked up at the blast, scared, not quite sure of what had thrown him aside, but knowing it had saved his life. He looked around a little, the world seeming to slow down slightly as the noise from the explosion died down and only the crackling of flames remained… and then he was unconscious and knew no more.


John awoke with a soft whine a long time later. He felt awful! His head hurt, a nasty aching, unfamiliar pain… he groaned and slowly opened one of his eyes, seeing a dimly lit room… a room he knew well… his room? He opened the other eye and blinked, his vision bleary and confusing. "Wh… wha happen?" he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.
"You got quite a concussion from that explosion…" said a soft, familiar voice next to him.
John blinked and gazed owlishly at the tall figure sitting beside his bed. "Piotr?"
"Yes, it is me… how are you feeling?"
John frowned, running a hand through his hair. "My head hurts…"
Piotr nodded, gently putting a hand on his shoulder. "You've been out for a couple of days… we're back at the base and you should be fine… it was good you warned us in time… but…" he paused, inhaling sharply, unsure how to continue.
"But what? Was someone hurt?" asked John, looking at the Russian, not used to seeing him lost for words.
Piotr sighed. "John… Remy threw you out of the way of the blast…" he started, frowning as John huffed at the mention of the Cajun's name. "He threw you far enough away to save you… but that placed him right next to the bomb…" he sighed, frowning and deciding to just come out with it. "John, nobody has seen him since the blast, I searched for hours but… All I could find… was this." The Russian sighed as he held up a bent and slightly charred object that looked like it had once been metal.
John, an expert on burned things, recognised it immediately, tensing up. "Remy's… bo-staff?"
Piotr nodded slightly, watching him, not sure what reaction to expect.
John stared at the object, part of him becoming cold and emotionless. Why should he care? Remy had betrayed him… he'd given up all good feeling for him on that day… if the Cajun was gone then so much the better, he'd sleep a little easier at night.
But another part of him felt differently, wincing slightly as he felt a pain in his chest. Had he really given up on Remy that much? He realised now what it had been that had tossed him away from the blast… Remy had given it all for him…he'd thrown John out of harm's way… and lost his own life in the process. Why would such a traitor do that? WHY?!

John felt deeply confused by these thoughts and emotions, feeling utterly torn about the whole thing. He gave a small sniffle and leaned towards Piotr, putting his arms around the Russian's neck, just wanting to be hugged, though he wasn't sure why. He'd never stopped trusting Piotr, the Russian was always so gentle and kind… he would never hurt anyone… and that made John feel safe with him like he once had with Remy.

Piotr sighed, gently putting his arms around the slender form, hugging him. He had no idea what to expect from John now… John had claimed to hate Remy so much… so very much…
Piotr had never been able to believe the change in him, and many times had tried to explain how it hadn't been Remy's fault, but John had always gone tight lipped and non-responsive on the subject… Eventually the Russian had given up.

But watching John had not been the hardest thing… it had been watching Remy. The decline in the Cajun's health and happiness had been clearly visible, he'd become thinner, his walk slow and heavy, his eyes had dulled… it was like the life had gone clean out of him. The Cajun had dealt with much loss in his life, but he seemed unable to cope with living alongside John when the pyromaniac wouldn't even look at him. He had started to take long trips away, asking Magneto for distant missions in any part of the world but where they were… anything that would get him away from the cold and betrayed John. It had been a terrible thing for Piotr to witness… but nothing he could do would sway John, and he was incapable of helping Remy… all he had been able to do was watch them both fall apart.

Piotr sighed softly as he looked down at John, who had buried his face in the Russian's shoulder, starting to sob a little. Could it be that John had finally realised he'd been missing Remy? That his hatred had only been misplaced loneliness and insecurity? Not that it mattered… if that was the case it was too little too late. If Remy's last act on earth had been to save John and show him that he had always been willing to give his life for him, then surely the pyromaniac would realise now that he had been wrong… surely.
"Are you okay John?" He asked gently.
John paused for a long moment before replying. "Piotr… why did he do that?"
Piotr sighed, "Why did Remy save you you mean?"
John nodded, looking up at him, his aqua eyes damp with tears.
Piotr sighed, gently sitting John up, leaning him against the pillows. "Because John, that's what he'd have always done for you."
John looked at him, deep confusion in his eyes. "But… what about…?"
Piotr shook his head, "I've tried to tell you many times now John… He never betrayed you… he was unable to stop that happening… he'd sooner have pulled his own heart out than have done that willingly to you."
John winced slightly as he remembered the sheer terror of those moments. "But… he hurt me…"
Piotr sighed, "In truth John it was not Remy that did that… the blue demon was the one whose fault it was."
John shook his head, confused, "But it was Remy who didn't protect us…"
Piotr sighed, rubbing his head a little, trying to think of a way he could put this in terms that John understood. "John… you know all mutant powers have limits? Some can take time and concentration to do… like a particularly complex fire creature of yours yes?"
John nodded a little, not sure where this was going.
"Well… Remy's power was like that too you see… and he was not the one who shrank us that time, it was the blue demon, so we did not have Remy's protection… are you following still?"
John nodded wordlessly.
"So, when the blue demon forced Remy to eat you, it took our Cajun a minute to summon his powers, focus enough and give you some protection… and that was slowed down even more by Kurt!" Piotr had had to listen to Remy go through this a thousand times, so he knew it off by heart now.
John looked at him, his mind carefully processing this information. "So… Remy… couldn't have done anything faster than he did?"
Piotr shook his head, "In truth he almost gave himself an injury doing it as fast as he did. I know you did not notice John… But Remy could not walk properly or use his powers for several days after we got back."
John sighed, leaning back a little. This was the first time he had actually listened to the Russian about this, and presented with clear examples and told slowly, the truth was starting to dawn on him… could he have been wrong?
Piotr watched him. "We were all hurt that day one way or another John, but it was not Remy's fault at all… do you understand that now?"
John nodded slowly. "I… think so…"
Piotr sighed, knowing that it was too late for forgiveness from anyone now, but if he was able to clear Remy's name in the eyes of the pyromaniac… he would feel a little better about all that had happened… he felt that he owed Remy that much.
John sniffled again suddenly, his eyes starting to fill with tears, "So that's why Remy threw me out the way? Cos he'd sooner die than let something bad happen to me?"
Piotr nodded slowly, "Yes John, that is why."
John curled his knees up to his chest, starting to realise the depth of how wrong he'd been. "But… I never got to say goodbye…"
Piotr sighed, "If we hadn't had this talk… would you have wanted to?"
John blinked, thinking about this. Would he have wanted to? If Piotr hadn't laid this out straight for him? He'd never have said anything and his 'hatred' for Remy would have burned on strong as ever… and he knew it. "Piotr… what do I do? I don't want him gone…" He said, tears pouring down his cheeks.
Piotr put a hand on his shoulder. "Forgive him John."
John whimpered. "But… that aint gonna bring him back…"
Piotr shook his head, "No, it won't, but it might let him rest in peace."
John started to sob at this, hugging Piotr again. NO! It wasn't fair! Remy couldn't be gone just like that… life wasn't that fragile was it?! Or was it?! John was so confused, the truth had hurt and confused him, but now he knew all he wanted to do was cling to Remy and beg to be forgiven… but Remy wasn't there… and wouldn't be.
He clung to the Russian, sobbing harder now… it was so unfair! Why had he had to wait until it was too late before listening to Piotr?! Now his chance was gone and he'd never seen Remy again… never say sorry, never feel that warm safety of playing with him again… it was over.

Piotr sighed, starting to wonder if he had done the right thing, but a part of him said that if he had not explained to John now, he would never have been able to, this was probably the first and last chance he would have had to explain. John was taking it very badly however, now sobbing uncontrollably in a mixture of misery at the loss of his friend and guilt that he had treated him so badly when he had not deserved it. There was no getting around it… but John was going to have to deal with it now.



That night, John found himself unable to sleep… he was very tired, but… so torn with guilt and bitter sadness that he couldn't manage even the lightest of sleeps. It was in the early hours of the morning when he rolled out of bed, wrapped himself firmly in his blanket for warmth, and snuck down the corridor to the Cajun's room. He shuffled into it shyly, almost as though he was trying not to wake the man who wasn't even there.
He looked around and then closed the door after himself, shuffling to the bed and all but falling into it. He sighed as he was surrounded by the smell of his friend, the familiarity of it soothing him. He frowned, burying his face in the pillows and inhaling deeply. Then as if someone had turned on a tap, he started to cry.
He brought his arms up to hug the pillow close as he sobbed into it, letting all of his emotion out. He wanted Remy back! It felt as though he was still here! How could he not be?! He lifted his tearstained face to look around, seeing the clothes left on the floor where Remy had changed into his uniform right before they left… as though he had been planning on coming right back! He saw a half-eaten packet of sweets on the bedside table… a book laying face down open to keep his place… spare deck of cards laying beside the lamp… John winced and gave a hollow sob, reaching out and picking up Remy's soft black shirt, the one with the pocket in the chest. He knew this shirt… knew it so well. He sobbed again and buried his face in the shirt, starting to whimper involuntarily as he did so. THIS WASN'T FAIR! Remy had been planning on walking right back into this room! Probably carrying a cup of tea with a good measure of whisky in it… as he always had after they got back from a mission… and he would have put it down and flopped on the bed… after a minute he'd have sat up to change… putting on the shirt… seeing the empty pocket… the pocket that John had occupied so happily, so many times.
John winced as he felt an intense shooting pain in his chest, suddenly feeling the pain that Remy must have felt every time he saw him… every time he was ignored, glared at or insulted… reminded of a betrayal he never committed, reminded that he had failed to protect his friend!
John cuddled the shirt and the pillow close again, sobbing uncontrollably. Now he understood… he knew the pain he had been putting Remy through, and now he could never say sorry, never make things right… the Cajun was gone and John knew he was never going to be able to forgive himself for his terrible misjudgement.



As the weeks passed, John did seem to deal with it a little bit, but not well. He refused to stop sleeping in Remy's bedroom and wouldn't let Magneto or Sabretooth throw the Cajun's possessions away, though they kept attempting to do so… he wouldn't allow it. Having lost most of Remy without being able to say goodbye, he was desperately holding on to what remained, futile though that was.

As weeks slid into months, winter came around, and John suffered the most from it, but he had no Remy to make it more bearable this time, and Piotr could only help so much.

It was a particularly nasty night, stormy and freezing cold, Piotr and John were in the kitchen, the pyromaniac trying to keep warm and Piotr making him some hot chocolate, knowing it was one of the only things that made him feel better in this weather. Everything seemed relatively normal, if a little gloomy, when they heard the distant noise of the base door opening.
This was very odd, for Sabretooth was in his quarters and Magneto was plotting in the study… there was nobody else who could open the door unless it was some kind of break in.

They looked at each other, frowning slightly before going to investigate. Low and behold, the door of the base was open, and a trail of wet footprints led into the base from it.
Piotr looked around nervously, shutting the doors and armouring up just in case as he examined the footprints before following them, John sticking close behind him, shivering slightly from the cold. After not too many steps however, the footprints dried out, leaving no trace of where the owner had gone.

Piotr sighed, looking around slowly. "John, we need to search the base, one room at a time, really carefully."
The pyromaniac said nothing, just nodding a little nervously, looking around.
The Russian nodded, and started a slow and methodical search, every room from the entrance onwards. This before long led them to the bedrooms, and both of them froze as they saw one door a tiny bit open… Remy's door.
Piotr frowned at this, immediately thinking it was one of the Cajun's less pleasant acquaintances coming to steal what was left of his possessions or something. But innocent John's heart leapt a little, praying that he was right, that the Cajun had come back by some miracle.

Piotr approached the door silently, tensed and ready to punch whatever was in there as he nudged the door open silently. The room was dark, the intruder having not turned the light on at all, all they could see was a tall figure with longish hair standing with his back to them.
That was all Piotr needed to see and he swung his fist angrily at the intruder, catching him squarely in the back with a loud thud, causing the figure to crumple to the floor easily. He hadn't killed him, but certainly whoever this was would think twice before trying to rob a dead man again. Thus he could barely believe it when the figure moved, trying to rise again, and he stepped forwards to hammer in another whack to get the man to stay down when John caught his arm, stopping him. "What if he's come back?!"
Piotr sighed, grabbing the man's shoulders and lifting him up, turning him into the light for John to see what he already knew. In the light from the doorway, John could see to his disappointment that the man had black hair, and his eyes were not onyx and ruby as he had hoped, instead a pair of mirror like, reflective eyes shone coldly back at him. John whimpered, turning away.
Piotr sighed, shaking the man. "Who are you?! And what are you doing here?!"
The man coughed a little, out of breath from the blow to his back, "I came to get something… as a reminder…"
Piotr blinked, shaking him again. "What?!"
The man closed his eyes. "Does it matter? I came to do a favour to a friend who is no longer with us."
Piotr frowned. "What favour?!"
The man held up his hand, opening his palm to reveal a small glass cat figurine… crudely made, it was something that John had spent hours and hours on for Remy's birthday a few weeks before the terrible event with Kurt had taken place.
John looked over at the tiny thing, then at the man. "Wh… Why would you come to take that?"
The man sighed, "He decided in his last moments that he wanted this…"
Piotr frowned, putting the man back on the floor. "You are making no sense!"
The man looked at him, the strange, mirror like eyes emotionless. "The man you knew as Gambit, he died, he had to suffer two deaths, and that is one more than any man should have to take. His soul died in a little shed in the middle of nowhere… his body died trying to save the thing that killed his soul." He looked at John.
John blinked, tears starting to run down his face. "I didn't know… I didn't understand!"
The man nodded, "He knew that much, and he couldn't live with being unable to make you understand."
Piotr stared at the man. "How do you know all this?"
The man sighed, "I was the only one there to witness his last moments, the one to hear his last regrets… and they were all about you John."
John winced, shaking his head. "I wanted to do something… I wanted him back… I just didn't know I did until… it was too late…"
Piotr sighed, "I think you had better leave."
The man nodded, "I shall leave, I have already caused even more suffering than before."
John blinked, looking at the man, tears running down his face. "Wait… what do you mean.. before?"
The man shook his head, "I think it would be better if you do not know…"

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Remy looked at John from behind the fake contact lenses, every bone in his body aching to go to the pyromaniac and hug him, make the tears go away, make the pain and the sorrow go away… but he could not.
His survival of the blast had been a miracle… a chance for him to go back and say goodbye. His recovery had taken long, and in that time he had thought about how to do it… He wanted to go back as himself… but if John had still been indifferent to him as he had expected, he would not have been able to carry on. So the idea had changed… go back as someone else, someone not himself… and take the one thing he had of John that he had held onto as a precious token of the bond… Then leave, like a shadow, and never go back.
The plan had gone awry however… and now he had to face them… most of him screamed to run away… go back to being nothing but a thief with no reliance on anyone… no cares, no boss… but now… as he looked at the faces of the two people in the world he had bothered getting to know… and saw that they were looking at him as if he were a total stranger… he felt a tear welling up in his eye… it hurt too much... he couldn't bear it.

He could face being looked upon as a friend, stranger or enemy… but being looked upon by a friend as a stranger or enemy… he couldn't cope with.

… Not again… if he ran away now… he'd never be happy… he'd never know if John really had forgiven him…

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Both John and Piotr stared at the man, who had suddenly gone deadly still, a tear running slowly down his cheek, then they moved back as he slowly reached up, just in case he was about to do something dangerous. Then they could only stare in surprise as he took hold of his dark hair and pulled back, the whole head of hair lifting backwards, a much more familiar layer of auburn hair flopping free underneath it.
John gave a soft little gasp of disbelief as the man reached up to his eyes, delicately removing something from them and slowly looking up a little, but not at them, the ruby and onyx eyes bright and shining slightly with unshed tears. "I came to say goodbye… thinkin' nobody would really care no more…"
Piotr was the first to move, going over to him and putting a hand under the man's chin, looking into the eyes for a long moment before giving a soft smile. "Remy, there wasn't one day, not one day… that we didn't wish you'd come back and give us another chance."
Remy blinked a little, "But… why Piotr? I was the one who failed you… Both of you when you needed my help the most."
Piotr sighed, "You really believe that? Really deep down you think that you didn't do everything in your power to help us?"
Remy shook his head, "I don't know any more."
Piotr sighed, knowing only one thing was going to help right now. He moved over to John and took the Aussie's arm, pulling him gently over to Remy.
John didn't resist, he'd just frozen up, staring at the floor, red in the face, embarrassed… apparently having forgotten everything he had ever intended to say to Remy.
Piotr smiled a little, pulling him until he was standing in front of Remy and then carefully lifting the Aussie's head until they were looking at each other, then he stepped back, watching.

There was a long moment of silence, John stared at Remy, and Remy stared at John, and then John suddenly crumpled to his knees with a sob, wrapping his arms around Remy's waist and clinging to him firmly, shaking uncontrollably as he wept. All of the emotion, the misplaced hatred, the frustration, the bitter sadness, everything that had been building within him was being let go in that moment as he sobbed into Remy's shirt, the familiar smell and warmth of his friend reaching his subconscious, making him realise how much he had missed all these things.

Remy just looked at him for a long moment, not knowing what to say, then he too fell to his knees, wrapping his arms around John and hugging him close.

Piotr nodded slowly, approvingly… At last… things were back the way they should be.


The next morning, Piotr walked into the kitchen to find Remy at the table, his arms folded around a cup of tea, looking tired, but vaguely human again. "Remy? Are you okay?" he asked softly, walking over to the Cajun. "You know Magneto will have a seizure if he finds you came back without telling him…"
Remy smiled, "I know, I'm rather looking forward to seein' his face."
Piotr nodded, going to make himself a tea. Last night, the three of them had talked for a long time, and then he had gone to leave Remy and John to make peace… he didn't know whether to be worried or pleased that John wasn't anywhere visible. "How… did it go last night… with John…" he asked softly.
Remy smiled weakly, "When he stopped cryin' it went well… we've made our peace."
Piotr smiled and shot Remy's gut a glance, "Have you now?"
Remy chuckled softly and put a hand on his stomach, "Once we made up… he asked if I would shrink him and go no further just to see how he felt about it…" he smiled softly. "It took him about five minutes to ask about goin' further… and within about ten minutes he was all but forcin' his way down." He traced a finger down his chest to show what he meant, letting the hand rest on his stomach when it got there. "Yes, we've made our peace."
Piotr nodded, joining him at the table. "So… no hard feelings? No resentment… nothing?"
Remy smiled softly, shaking his head, "We have agreed to put it all behind us and never speak of it again."
Piotr chuckled and then leaned across the table to pull Remy into a firm hug. "It is good to have you back Cajun."
Remy grinned and hugged the huge man back. "It's good to be back Piotr."

END